Metaphorically yours..

The pen is mightier than the sword, and the metaphor is one of the strongest products that a pen can conceive. For people very anal about their grammar, obviously when I say metaphor, I implicitly also refer to all analogical literary devices. Metaphors buy you precious time in tricky situations (Riddles in the Dark anyone?), they can easily add insult to injury, and employed in literature, lower the temperature of the literary piece by a significant bit.(Um..make it cool, in other terms :P. This however is because metaphors make writing difficult to understand and anything that people do not get is uber cool, by definition.)

Here's a thought. Metaphors also create a sense of unity, a sense of brotherhood if you will. It's pretty much the same with jokes too. Here's how, I make a decent joke because I'm smart, now you got the joke and laughed at it, ergo, you're smart too. And smart people tend to get along very, very well. Maybe we could you know, work towards winning a Nobel jointly or something, who knows?

The confusion, or the fun, as far as the observers are concerned, occurs when the (do forgive the usage of the terms to follow, it's just that using them gives me the kicks) Metaphor-er and the Metaphor-ee cease to be on the same wavelength and hence the Metaphor in question is labeled a bad one. And when this happens, chaos reigns.

What could be more fun, as a few of us friends discovered one fine evening, is interpreting dialogues from films as metaphors. Most dialogues can be interpreted in more than just the context they're meant to be relevant to. Want examples? Always at your service,

Star Wars,

• 'I have a bad feeling about this' -used in the bedroom or in the toilet.
• 'I love you.''I know.' -used in a Bollywood movie.
• 'May the force be with you' -used in a physics assignment, or at a game of cards(read force as fours in which case).
• 'Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size do you?' - Amazing how I cannot think of a non sexual connotation for this, try as hard as I might.
• 'Twilight is upon me, and soon night must fall. That is the way of things, the way of the Force' - Somehow, the word Twilight repulses me, not funny.
• 'I am your father' - I dunno, 20 years after a Kumbh Mela perhaps?

The Lord of the Rings

• 'The wizard arrives precisely when he means too.' -This one I'll leave to speculation. Hint: the word 'arrives' :P
• 'The Dark Lord Sauron..yadda yadda' -if this isn't racist, nothing is.
• 'The Black Riders!' -And just when you thought nothing could be more racist.
• 'Three rings for the elven kings...' - Let's say Jack Nicholson was hired to voice the opening lines from The Fellowship. He'd probably go about it like, Three fucking Rings for the fucking Elven-kings under the fucking sky,
  Seven for the fucking Dwarf-lords in their fucking halls of stone,
  Nine for fucking Mortal Men doomed to fucking die,
  One for the Dark fucking Lord on his dark fucking throne
  In the Land of fucking Mordor where the fucking Shadows lie.
  One fucking Ring to rule them all, One fucking Ring to find them,
  One fucking Ring to bring them all and in the fucking darkness bind them
  In the Land of fucking Mordor where the fucking Shadows lie.
  
  

More soon.

Becoming successful at supervillany..for Dummies.

It's amazing how many superheroes are there, and for every superhero you have at least half a dozen unique (super)villains. It's somewhat amazing that while almost no superhero is all powerful, most supervillains have a very tough time facing up to these (forgive the metaphor) sacks full of crap. My sympathies lie not with the hero who well, for one, almost always gets the girl, it lies with the antagonist who's never experienced true love and whose only aim is world domination. Obviously there are villains with other motives, but you see, once world domination is achieved, everything else can happily fall into place. The idea behind the guide is to create a sort of primer for anybody who wishes to be a supervillain, obviously this won't take care of everything, just quite a healthy lot.

The supervillain kit

• A mirror: For all sorts of rays and lasers. Most worthy neutralisations(MWN's) - Superman and Shaktimaan.
• A stick of kryptonite crystal. -The end of Superman.
• Minions with Guns. MWN's -Heroes with no superpowers, notably Batman, the Phantom etc.
• A Neogenic Recombinator and a large attractive female Tarantula. MWN's -Spiderman.
• A cortosis sword. The entire Star Wars universe.
• A large magnet. MWN's -Wolverine among other heroes with metallic costumes.
• The anti-mutating agent to the X-gene. MWN's the X Men, and other mutated superheroes. Some'd say Spiderman too, but hey, he's just easier to get with the female spider.
• A trip wire. MWN's -Flash.
• AT-AT's. MWN's -Flash Gordon.
• Anti venom for snake toxins. MWN's -Nagraj.
• A couple of bitches. MWN's -Doga.
• A couple of hot chicks. MWN's -Iron Man.

Do's and Dont's

Always,

• Press the big red button already.
• Run for your life if you see a little green creature spouting bad grammar rushing towards.
• If you're gonna inject a toxin, do it NOW.
• Cover vulnerabilities in your large space station with wooden planks.
• Have a backup power supply.
• Close all renegade wormholes to alternate universes. (Universes? :P)
• Check your mathematical calculations for stupid errors.
• Equip the robots you make with a fail safe self destruct mechanism.

Don't ever,

• Mess with Chuck Norris or Rajnikanth.
• Insult Lois Lane.
• Pity Batman.
• Say something on the lines of, 'With great power, yadda yadda..'
• Laugh like the joker.
• Make an anti venom for the toxin you invented.
• Even if you do have an anti venom, just don't reveal where it's kept, to anybody.
• Feel sorry for the plants/birds/minions you lose.
• Stand close to a wormhole that leads to an alternate universe.
• If possible, stay away from the WAG's, it just seems to make them madder.

Obviously this list is countably infinite and additions are possible. But if you're looking to invest in a career as a supervillain, a little headstart wouldn't hurt would it?

SUCKY-MAN

“It’s a bird! It’s a plane! Oh wait..yep it is.”

/*

Disclaimer :
While this act of blasphemy might not go down very well with the Superman fanboys, this is a risk I’ve got to take for reasons I shall explain soon. If I do end up getting lynched in a public place, my lawyer(s) will know who to (pur?)sue.

*/

Let’s begin by facing a truth, shall we? And this truth, believe it or not, involves you. The thing is that I happen to know that you sir, are a geek. Don’t ask me how. It’s just one of those things you know.

(For example, if you were to find one fine day that the food in the mess is um..tolerable, you’d know for a fact that one of two things have occurred, a) you’re in a dream or b) you’ve somehow managed to get yourself transported to a parallel universe. Any other possibilities that you come up with can mathematically be shown to be equal to either of these two, I'd go into the space-time calculations here, but it's what people love to call, 'out of scope').

Anyway, not to be digressing, working on the more than decent assumption that you’re a geek, it’d be logical to surmise that you’d have a favourite superhero. And if that’s Superman, you’re in for a treat.

If you were to sit back and spend some time thinking of reasons about why Superman is well..just lame, I’d bet that you’d come up with quite a few. Here's a few I could think of,

• The Hairstyle. Not only is Superman's hairstyle out of fashion since the 1960's, it's something that looks just about decent almost exclusively on a pet poodle. It's probably okay though if Superman's actually a transvestite or something, anyone know for sure?

• The Disguise. A disguise Lex Luthor's grandchild would have seen through. Too bad he doesn't have one.

• The Name. A name that he probably should have had changed or something. I mean come on, if it wasn't enough that he wears bright red knickers on a skin tight blue thingy, the dude calls himself Superman! Even if it were the people who gave him the name, everybody has rights. An affidavit to change one’s name doesn’t take much time, does it?

• The IQ. Or let's just say, the lack of it. Speculatively, it should be somewhere around just lesser than Forrest Gump's, likely equal to Megan Fox's.

• The Melodrama. If only you could win girls over by catching them while they fell from high rise structures...we'd at least know for sure what works..

• The Outfit. A RED cape. BLUE tights. RED knickers worn over his pants. Enough said.

Reasons enough? I guessed as much :P

The above borrows heavily from a Batman vs Superman conversation I had with a friend a few days back. Hope I've proven a point.

On Life, the Universe and Everything.

42.

THAT IS MAHALAKSHMI!

(If you're a retard, or you're slightly off the rocker, avoid going to Texas. The 'slow' people as they're called there, get the chair, no questions asked. No seriously they do, no kidding.)

Before the retard catchers from Texas arrive at my doorstep, let me clarify. 'THAT IS MAHALAKSHMI' was what this huge poster I saw yesterday read. What was weird was where...on the college main stage. Most people found this stupid, because it was, and annoying, because they'd blocked the winding road through the rocks which people generally took and everybody had to use the longer route.

For some unfathomable reason however, I found this incredibly funny and broke into laughter when I first saw this..this..abomination. Pretty similar to how every dark cloud has a silver lining blah blah blah, most occurrences have a funny side. And this isn't just philosophy, it's hard fact. We've always been preaching about how 'taking lite' was the better thing to do, how many times have we 'taken lite' ourselves? (For people who don't know what 'taking lite' is, shame on ye' fellers!)

I could give you say..6 reasons why this poster is hilarious. No? Here goes.

• Picture this. A film company travels 40 kms to the outskirts of Hyderabad to an engineering college, just to put up a large 10 feet by 10 feet poster which says.....'THAT IS MAHALAKSHMI! ' :D
• Try as hard as you might, it's kinda hard to think of what context this could be used in a movie. Knowing Tollywood films however, if they had a song sequence where they repeated 'THAT IS MAHALAKSHMI!' over and over while gyrating in front of the poster in question, I for one, wouldn't be surprised. That the locals would love this, is probably even funnier :P
• I know, a thought bubble! Like for example, our hero sees his long lost love or something after a long time. How do we know what he's thinking? 'THAT IS MAHALAKSHMI!'
• Or it could just be wrong grammar. They probably meant 'THIS IS MAHALAKSHMI!' instead of 'THAT IS MAHALAKSHMI!'. Publicizing the fact that you've no idea how simple English Grammar works on a very large poster is just plain and simple awesome.
• Or it could be something that makes sense. Like when the film ends, and the director(probably somebody called Mahalakshmi) expects everyone to be touched or crying or something. (Trust me, doesn't take much to touch people around here :P) And he signs off saying something like, 'See? THAT IS MAHALAKSHMI!' Makes sense, but still funny.

Did I say 6 reasons? Everybody lies :P

Poli-Poli...

I just had to do one on the elections. It's all the rage now, and everybody else's doing it. Because I feel very divided, not to add undecided on the issue, I'll do both sides of a debate. Imagining a whole conversation could sound creepy, not to add pretty tough to some, but it's a matter of habit really. For practice, imagine you're having one with Scarlet Johansson, it helps :P

Me:

While we have had enough of people bitching about why so-and-so's manifesto sucks ass and why 'NONE' is the best choice to pick in this year's campus elections, not most of our grievances are unjust. We've seen just about enough of how dirty politics can get. We've seen almost everything possible, from people licking first-year-student ass to people trying to manipulate us, begging us to vote for them, and all this on the very first time we've met them. We've also, in a very literal sense, had enough of pamphlets. While the amount of money(I'm guessing quite a lot) you've spent is entirely your concern, the 3 fliers I have been finding slid under my door for the past week have been harder to catch hold and dispose of than the occasional moth. And when you did turn up, as it is customary among your breed to do, all you managed to influence was the Age of Mythology game I was playing on LAN. Another of your kind accosted us at Amul, and made us listen to a full two minutes of the crap he was spouting. In short, you've made life on campus terrible, and we know you'll do nothing once you're elected. If you think you'll get a letter recommending how awesome you've been as whatever post you're contesting for or something, you're wrong. And this for some odd reason, you fail to apprehend. Go get a life.

P.S. Did I mention how awesome your website was? The colors remind me of this drawing I made when I was in the first grade...

The candidate:

Let's agree for a moment that I've managed to make life difficult in the campus for you during the past week. What you fail to realise, is that you're as much a member of the campus as I am. The only difference being, I filed a nomination and you didn't. Things that happen around the campus affect you as much as they do. Unlike you, I choose to be a part of things that affect me. And all you've lost is some time listening to what I have to say, and a LAN game. Things that perhaps look serious to you, because you haven't put any thought into what the elections mean for you. As for the fliers and the website are concerned, there was no other way to get my point across. Posters were banned this year, something you'd probably know.

I've done nothing what you wouldn't have done in my shoes. What you've called ass-licking, is actually me interacting with people, telling them who I was and what I planned to do. I did not ask them not to vote for someone else, I didn't promise anything that couldn't be done. Tell me there's any better way to have done this. When you say I won't keep my promises, or I'm doing all this for recognition, you assume a lot. In other words, you're assuming I'm doing what you would have.

Considering you're going to vote for a friend of yours anyway, calling me a hypocrite is just thick.

All I ask you to do, is to make an informed choice. For once, give it a serious thought. Apathy, as they say, is death.

P.P.S. The (whatever little) positivity that is there in this post, is probably due to Iron & Wine on loop. No other apparent reason. Do sample.

Achtung Baby!

Let's begin with a little philosophy. Philosophy's totally the 'in' thing nowadays anyway. (Has been so for a long time, as a matter of fact. Refuse to digress.) People are (in general, always exceptions) considered to be quite a few rungs above animals in the evolutionary hierarchy. For most of us, this is true just because we exist. Some of us are not so lucky and have to work very hard to put up a decent show. But you know, some things will never change. Some basic functional similarities, just because an organism's heart beats. What I'm talking about is(and don't tell me you were expecting this), is the need to look cool.

Every organism does what it thinks it's cool to do. A moth dances around a light for no apparent reason, a dog licks its own ass, a person(being at the pinnacle of evolution that he/she is) does a variety of things. Since blogging about animals is no fun as they can't hit back, let's focus on people in India and list a few, shall we?

• People and music : Some music by definition is cool. Some on the other hand...Auto wallahs listen to item numbers, people sitting inside the autos listen to Metallica. Both pump up the volume when a hot chick walks by, no idea why. Some just pretend to be U2 fans.

• People and books : Half of India thinks Chetan Bhagat's cool. The other half, have actually read his books. Books based on movies are cool too. You can claim you've read them and none the wiser. For example, for people who think they've read The Lord of the Rings, you wouldn't happen to remember who Glorfindel was, would you?

• People and blogging : The less said the better :P

• People and movies : Now this, depends on the people you hang out with to a large extent. For example, claiming to have watched 'Gunda' might not be cool everywhere. Hardly anybody understood Inception, but everybody facebooked(and/or blogged) about it, just because they thought it made them cool. Another example, watching a Hitchcock movie might be cool with your Saturday morning movie club, but your friends will call you a stuck up ass. (They usually do anyway so it mightn't matter.)

• People and sports : Ah, finally. For the average Indian college goer, tell me you're not guilty of claiming to support a certain club in the EPL, and I won't believe you. Girls can be pardoned I guess. (You know how it is with girls and footballers ;) ) Supporting Mannu just because it's the only club you've heard about is well, lame. Supporting an Italian or Spanish club just because you think it's exotic, ergo, it's cool, is kinda stupid too. You might say you genuinely think they're good, but it's not as if anybody's gonna believe you anytime soon :P

• People and facebook : A large percentage of attempting to look cool on facebook includes shortening words. The question is who decides what's cool and what's not? As a general rule of thumb, if it looks lame to you, it is(duh!). A couple examples, 'ma' is generally used as a term of endearment for one's mother. Generally speaking, never use as a short form for 'my' because it's not, and if you're genuinely missing your mom, give her a call or something. '\m/' is often abused to the extent that it becomes redundant. Most people know when to use it, but I've come across, 'Had a horrible day :( \m/' too so you never know. 'Oh and 'Suppalike's' gay btw. Just so you know.

• People and the World Cup : Just in context you know, so worth a mention. People do everything, from supporting England to wanting Argentina to win just so because of the Maradona thingy(Maradona's thingy? I dunno.. ;) )

• People and popular culture : Probably encompasses everything already talked about. You've got to be cautious when you make references to something. Say for example, the retort you make to somebody on facebook, doesn't remain witty if it's not caught. Making references to loads of things, eliminates a large part of your audience, (given there's any to begin with of course.) If you've heard of Venn diagrams, the idea should be pretty obvious.

Some would say looking cool is in your own head. You do what you do best, you do what you feel like. If you don't give a damn about what people think, everything's hunk-dory right? Wrong.

So you've gotta be very careful about what you do and refrain from doing anything that looks even remotely out of place right? Wrong Again. Go figure :P

"Nolan's messed up my mind..."

Let's get this straight. Inception wasn't a bad watch, not in the very least. Thing is, I do have some issues with a Nolan film, just as a rule, if you will. He's a good film maker, he works with good actors in Bale and Michael Caine and his films are different from what Hollywood feeds us generally. But my musings have very little, if anything at all, to do with his films. What I find far more interesting, is to observe how people respond to a Nolan flick. Do note however, that these categories would apply to people watching any kind of movie, just the fact that they're so very prominent after a Nolan movie. Here's a few I've managed to come across,

• The desi. He's never heard of Chris Nolan, (he's probably seen The Dark Knight, dubbed or no really doesn't matter) and he'd rather watch Sonam Kapoor in a salwar kameez than Inception. He also has a 'thing' for Angelina Jolie, though all he restricts himself is to watching Youtube(Read Metacafe) videos, and abstains faithfully from a full length English movie.
  
• The hypocrite. He hasn't understood anything in a Nolan film ever barring the ending credits, but the first thing he does when he gets back home is post on facebook how awesome the whole thing was, and gives it a 5 star rating. Actively participates in discussions though, restricting his shitty self to commenting on how sexy he thought the female lead was. Just for the record, says he supported Spain at FIFA '10.
  
• The genius. His only regret in life? Not being christened Christopher Nolan. Actively points out how the film could have been made better, and complains about flaws, existent and non-existent. Not taken seriously in friend circles generally due to a plethora of past offenses which include saying how Al Pacino didn't do well enough to win the Oscar for Godfather II.
• The Harry Potter fan. (Contrary to popular belief I have as a matter of fact, managed to find such a person.) Compares The Prestige to Harry Potter 4 and says Inception was far better than Harry Potter 5. What he lacks is a pack of friends to beat the sense into him I think.
• The Twilight fan. Similar to the Harry Potter fan, except he's gay.
• The Harry Potter AND Twilight fan. If you know such a person, please shoot him(note : it's okay if it's a her..) in the head and put him out of his misery.
• The idiot. Is pretty candid about how he didn't get a single thing, and acquiesces to the fact sheepishly, batting his eyelids at the same time. Generally a she btw.
• The glutton. Might look a bit odd, but I assure you, I have a friend who goes with us to the theatres just for the popcorn and momos. Nobody knows what he thinks about the films he watches while gorging on Food. On being asked how he thought Inception was, all he says among mouthfuls of junk crap is, 'Acchi Thi'.
• The Attention hog. He swings into action the moment the end credits start rolling. He messages all his friends and updates social networking sites from his phone. Frames a tweet/ fb update on his way back home on how he's had a top that doesn't stop spinning all along. Only this time he calls it a totem.
• The facebook addict. Differs from the attention hog in the fact that he's taken quizzes on facebook which tell him what totem'd suit him the best, and how much time he'd be able to free himself in when chained and locked in a box and kept underwater.
• The critic. Might end up showing some traits of 'The genius' if he's not too careful. The only person in the lot who's seen 'The Following'.

To people who think the title'd make an excellent FB update and people do give a damn about what you think, a word of advice - Nolan flicks are flicks like every other, and to say that 'They've messed up your mind... ooooh' etc. suggest nothing but perhaps the fact that it's time you pay your family psychiatrist a visit.
If you don't get Inception on the other hand, fret not, watch something else like Salt instead. If that sounds daunting too, I dunno, but isn't there an Akshay Kumar flick lined up too?

Aaand...It's Over :(

Ah, well. Long time no see :) Let's just say I've been busy with the world cup, watching up to three matches a day can be pretty hectic.

Anyway, everybody knows how everything unfolded, who had the last laugh, and who perhaps deserved a little more etc. etc. The cup in itself wasn't without its talking points however, what with people cursing FIFA, the vuvus and sea creatures, we had enough action off the field to supplement whatever was missing on it.

Teams disappointed, and quite a few of them at that too, where'd they miss out?

France:

• Domenech. Proposed to his fiance after the Euro debacle, after this expected to go to the Middle East and marry half a dozen times.
• Henry. Learnt an important fact. You don't win the cup with your hands, not unless you're Maradona.
• Play Anelka, Gallas and Henry in the first team. "You must be stupid, stupid, stupid."-The Rainmaker.

Argentina:

• Unfortunately for Maradona, his team was just a bunch of 11 straight guys.
• Considering how quick they wanted to get back home to their girlfriends, make that '11 straight guys with super hot girlfriends'.

Nigeria

• Not much to say is there? They aren't going to play any international football for two years, which is going to affect their qualification for the next WC. A vicious circle really.

England:

• Yawn. Did well to qualify :P
• Interesting FB update, "Apparently Wayne Rooney's broken David Blaine's record of spending 42 hours enclosed in a box, doing nothing."

USA:

• I maintain, what they should do is offer citizenship to better players from around the globe. (eg. Pretty sure Drogba'd have accepted for one.)
• For the record, they did win the cup, in their computer simulations, beating arch rivals England 7-5 on penalties after a 15-15 draw.

Serbia:

• Another case of everybody wanting to play Goalkeeper. You do not touch the ball with your hands, you morons!

Cameroon

• Indomitable? Nah. Lions? Nah. Pathetic? ...

Italy

• Average age among the oldest in the competetion. Wives have been heard to say, 'Aao, Moov laga doon...' after fixtures.
• Sad, that I've always had a soft spot for the Azzurri, dunno maybe they should've brought Del Piero? Though that would increase the average age further by about 9 months...

Brazil

• An awful world cup for the Selecao. If this was cricket, Kaka would go back and open a Dhaba and call it..Nah, I'll let this pass.
• 'I find your lack of flair disturbing'- Lord Vader.

Ivory Coast

• Players received lots of calls after they wore skin tights in their opening fixture, sad that they could concentrate on the game no longer.
• Sven Goran Eriksson, now now, who in their right mind hires him? See what he did to England!

Portugal

• Cristiano Ronaldo, If only he could put his tricks to good use, like Zidane did, but then he's always been too busy showing off, so not really a disappointment eh?
• Discovered that he's fathered a child after the WC, well, we all go through bad phases :P

Chile

• Tough to mention them without using any puns ;), let's just say they didn't really set things on fire against far weaker opposition in their group.

Switzerland

• What's awesome and has holes? Swiss Cheese. What's not so awesome and has holes? The Swiss defence..
• The Swiss are magnanimous people, they make good cheese, manufacture uber cool watches, stash people's money away, and sacrifice sure shot qualification to let others qualify.

That's the lot, isn't it? A feeling of sadness and despair engulfs me as the fact that South Africa 2010's over finally sinks in. Two long years to Poland-Ukraine....

'Is it time?' Well, almost.

Just over half an hour to go for the opening ceremony of the World's largest sporting event to begin. It's one we've waited for, in fact dreamt about for years(4 years to be precise). And rewarded we will be, for Africa's finest hour, promises to be a cracker of a tournament. Africa has always been getting the raw end of most deals for some time now. Littered with racism, war and corruption, Africa's tale over the years has been one of misery and woe. But their passion for the beautiful game conquers all, brings them together as a whole continent. Although how hospitable South Africa actually will be remains to be seen, the air all around buzzes with excitement, a form of chaos even the vuvuzelas can't imitate. Africa, with its 'Heart of Gold' is set to conquer millions of hearts the world over.

Spain this time are overwhelming favourites, but a possible second round/QF clash with perennial favorites Brazil has many people drooling already. Argentina, handed a weak group should do well too. The European quartet of the English, Dutch, the Azzurri and the fierce Germans are also tipped to do well. Keep an eye out for the African nations too, considering that World Cups have always been won by a team of the same continent as the host, with the exception of Brazil in 2002. As to what actually happens is something only time can predict.

Waka on Africa!

Listless?!

(def. Drained out of energy, Lethargic. Nothing to do with lists though.)

If a trustworthy institution (let's face it, basically non-Indian) were to conduct a survey of things that people lose most often, lists would feature in the top few. But have you ever wondered why lists possess this uncanny ability to get lost when you need them the most? It can’t be a coincidence, not every time, not with everybody. And the impression you get is as if these infernal objects have a mind of their own. A scheming, devilish mind, whose only idea of pleasure is the utter bewilderment of its maker.

I remember this one time, a day before I was leaving for Delhi, I made a list of certain essentials to take back home, you know, just a few knick knacks that tend to get forgotten amidst all the chaos of last minute packing. And there this list was, all the last week, peeking at me out of the bottom drawer like an innocent babe. To make a long story short, when I (finally) set out of campus, I was wondering whether I’d ever made such a list. The simple reason being, I couldn’t find it. And take it from me; I went through my room with a toothcomb. At the very least, it was a sight to behold. Debris scattered everywhere, all the hours I’d put into neatly packing my clothes laid to waste, in fact, if the dramatics people had wanted a post-apocalyptic setting there and then, they’d have been more than happy to use my room as such. But all this apparently wasn’t reason enough for a puny list to turn up, and if it didn’t want to be found, it just couldn’t be, could it?

When I got back after a couple months, I opened my drawer to shove my headphones in, and I swear to god and may his hand smite me this very instant if the following be a lie, it was there, staring me in the eye, in all its hellish glory. Lists are a device of the devil, and if you take my advice, you’ll stay away from them and stick to whatever it is that your religion preaches.

Yay!

I've finally realised the joy of being able to write anything on the face of the earth. Random banter forever \m/

zzzz....

Ah well, its been on my conscience for a week now, but then it's not like many people are going to read this or anything. And sadly but truly, life has been insanely dull over the last couple weeks, the most extraordinary thing being how a classmate finished a 3 hour paper in 10 mins. (Everybody else was out within an hour, so it's not THAT big a deal I guess.)

But this was (only?) a week back, although it seems nowhere like it. AOM matches were played(or rather organized as we finished very few, the highlight was this 12 player mega-match where everything lagged like hell and everybody had enough time to IM in the background), people helped each other pack and goodbyes were said all around. Most of us had trains to catch early in the morning and this most of us successfully managed.

The food was awful as usual, and all we did was sleep. Matter of fact, I slept almost all the way and have no real inkling to what the others did, for all I care they slept all the way too.(Sleep well, and the world sleeps with you eh?) But there was this general amicability among us, and this was noteworthy, considering no less than three people had come up to me and said how they couldn't stand at least one person of the group we were travelling as a part of. Interesting effect trains have on people. It is in a sense obvious, considering you can only have so many differences with a person if you're stuck with them in an enclosed space for an extended duration. Who knew the solution to all our problems, all enmities between people could be as simple as train rides huh? (This could be applied to world peace, couldn't it now?) But I digress, and as I won't take any names here, it's a point hardly worth making.

So we got home, and the initial overwhelming excitement (good food being the primary catalyst here) declined slowly into a steady sense of contentedness.

But as it stands, I have no new games to play, the ones I have await a long due system upgrade, I watch a movie a day which provides very little in the way of mental exercise, and there was the Champions league final, yes, but watching a one sided match from a neutral perspective can only be so exhilarating.

In short, I'm bored, bored as hell, and no amount of watching TV or attempting to play games I've already finished are any help. I've finished books by the dozen, been on strolls, even tried my hand at cooking but nothing seems to help. Not even the PS , where all we've managed is a week off to get bored in.

All I have is 11 June, and this I eagerly look forward to.

Peace.

Welcome Back, Me!

Ah, has it been a long, long time or what? Even as far as blogging goes, the respite that readers and (god have mercy upon them) followers get between two posts is generally quite a few rungs below a period of two years!

Things change over two years, even gradual changes are pretty much visible. For instance, I'm pretty much done with being a teenager (not that I had much of a choice in the first place..) and it feels sad. The years of being a rebellious teenager will stay etched in my memory (and perhaps the memories of all people for whom I made life hell) forever. It's just a couple of months now, and the general feeling among most of my friends is one of general glumness, yeah. (But that's possibly due to their own teenage coming to an end, not mine...)

But then again, this blog when it was initiated, was not one where glumness had its say! And that is something I shall stand by, for as long as I live.(And that might be quite a lot since yours truly is still as sober as ever!) . How about a look at things that haven't changed?

1) First and foremost, in thick and thin, sobriety has been an ally every instance the last two years. True, there have been a few sleep-deprivation induced incidents of exceeding eccentricity, but I still remain a teetotaller. Not a fact I am particularly proud of or anything, it's just something that is, and something that ensures that I can look myself in the eye before writing on societyofsoberstudents.com...

2) I remain a fan of certain franchises, no longer few in number though. I promised a friend I wouldn't make a single reference and this I stand by (at least for now). :(

3) Though (hopefully) posts != rants any more, the mind on the other hand maintains a certain demented character.

4) My schizophrenic self, who's currently sound asleep is still my best companion.

5) I still suck at mugging up things, eating healthy, most sports, Counter-Strike, and non Computer Science subjects.

6) The list would be endless; the use of four limbs, most other vital organs (I'm guessing), a perennial longing for good food, new games and books, a love for football, etc.

The introspection was a good exercise, perhaps I should do this more often, perhaps I will. A lot of friends update blogs regularly and if not anything else, maybe what we call 'peer pressure' will provide me with whatever motivation may be necessary.

But as of now, I revel in it. The second coming.

P.S. 'Let there be Light' - The Hindustan Times.

P.P.S To A- No references to pop culture! Bazinga!